The phrase “Buyers are liars” comes from car sales, but it’s found a comfortable home in real estate. It’s the industry’s way of explaining why a buyer’s stated needs rarely match their final purchase. Usually it’s one of four things: They don’t yet understand their own needs; they’re embarrassed by their finances; their priorities shift mid-search; or they’re angling for leverage by saying one thing and doing another.

“I’m not working with an agent” is one of the most common lies — and one of the most understandable. Technically, it’s true: They’ve called directly to inquire. But usually, an agent has already been earning their trust, sending listings, and explaining the market. Buyers say this, hoping to “get a deal” from the listing agent. Since the Sitzer- Burnett case, we’re hearing it more often, and it’s a shame, because buyer agency is more necessary, and more broken, than ever.

“Yes, I’m working with an agent.” That’s the one we hear at open houses. And really, who can blame them? Nobody wants a flood of follow-up calls and emails from random agents they’ll never use. The open house sign-in sheet has become an exercise in fiction. Sellers probably learn more from their Ring Cameras than from those signatures.

“I’m preapproved for X. I can’t spend more than Y.” That’s the lie that isn’t. Buyers just don’t yet know where the intersection of desire, pride, and market reality will lead them. I’ve had more than one client start in the “low 2’s” and end up shopping in the “low 3’s.” We all begin with logic, then justify the stretch: It’s worth it. It’s such a deal. It’s our forever house. And so, we adjust.

Susan Engel used to say that every year, maybe one or two houses were truly “mis-priced.” When that happened, the office lit up — agents whispering, “Who do I have for this one?” If it was really mispriced, an agent probably bought it. Many buyers still believe they can get an edge by being first or being the only offer. But in today’s market, those so-called “mis-priced” opportunities are almost always off-market deals snapped up by patient cash buyers willing to overlook the flaws everyone else can’t.

“This is our best and final offer.” We’ve all said it, and it’s often a lie for the same familiar reasons. It was my best offer until I learned I had competition. Or until I realized it wasn’t enough. Or until the alternative disappeared. Once we say “best and final,” are we truly committed? Of course not. Sometimes it just means, “I’m tired.” Other times, we genuinely believe it. And for a few, it’s a tactic — an attempt at leverage that often backfires. An ultimatum gives the seller the perfect excuse not to counter at all. Negotiation training teaches the opposite: Always leave room for the counter-offer.

Buyers lie mostly to themselves. To feel in control, they create structure: a timeline, a target number of homes to see, an arbitrary deadline, such as “We’ll move this year.” But the market doesn’t care about our plans. Inventory shifts, competition changes, and inertia sets in. Most buyers simply renew the lease and wait for next year.

Buyer frustration stems from a simple paradox: Everyone wants lower prices (63%) and lower rates (50%), but you can’t have both. Lower rates bring higher prices and more competition. Sustained “high” rates usually mean a strong economy keeping inflation in check. That’s the trade-off we’re all living with.

Mortgage rates have eased this year, and after several years of runaway appreciation, price growth has finally cooled. We’ve turned a corner: Wage growth now comfortably outpaces home prices, giving buyers a little more breathing room — and a few more options.

But that’s the national narrative — broad, optimistic, and detached from local reality. In our four Fairfield County towns, buyers don’t have more choices; they have fewer. Inventory is at record lows. Days on market are shorter. Months of supply are tighter than ever. Here, the story is the opposite: Competition is fierce, and choices are vanishing.

What about prices? Strip out the seasonal noise and look at the 12-month moving averages: Price growth here remains strong. Both the average and median are up, condos and single-families alike, across all four towns, rising between 7% and 20% year over year.

What about mortgage rates? They still move in lockstep with the 10-year Treasury yield, as they have for half a century. The 10-year is expected to drift lower over the next six months, and mortgage rates should follow. The spread between them, roughly two points, has held remarkably steady.

So what’s a buyer to do? Realtor. com data shows that the prime window to buy, in most markets, comes in mid-October, when listings peak and competition thins. That pattern holds here, too: Inventory starts to drop in October and hits its lowest point by December.

According to the National Association of Realtors, the typical homeowner has gained $201,600 in equity over the past decade from price appreciation alone. Bankrate reports that the average mortgage-holding homeowner now has about $302,000 in total equity. Meanwhile, the share of home sales going to first- time buyers has fallen, as established owners leverage that built-up equity to move up or trade laterally with confidence.

The Hubbard Clause is back. In today’s cutthroat game of musical chairs, buyers won’t, and often can’t, sell before locking down their next home. That’s why we’re seeing a comeback of the Hubbard Clause, the contingency allowing a buyer to withdraw if their current home doesn’t sell. During the frenzy of bidding wars, that clause was dead. Its reemergence shows buyers are feeling more empowered, and getting creative about bridging the gap between selling and buying.

Some banks are meeting the moment with interest-only bridge loans, offered month-to-month against the equity in a home, a cleaner, faster alternative to the uncertainty of a Hubbard Clause. It’s a relatively inexpensive way for buyers to compete before listing or feeling pressured to take a low offer. Credit to Chuck Threshie at Total Mortgage for flagging this product; Google him if you need it.

Notes from the Monday Meeting

Several closings last week came with last-minute surprises. In two, listing agents scrambled to remove truckloads, up to six, of junk left behind. In another, faulty paperwork delayed the closing. (Pro tip: in Connecticut, the power of attorney can’t also notarize an affidavit.) One bank even demanded an electrician’s sign-off that brand-new GFCI outlets were, in fact, new, so the electrician replaced new outlets with new outlets. Wasteful? Absolutely.

Sometimes we, as Realtors, could do a better job setting expectations. “Broom clean” should be obvious by now, but most of these hiccups get resolved with a small hold-back at closing. That’s why we try to catch them early.

Connecticut sued Zillow? Yes. The state joined New York and three others in suing Zillow over a $100 million payment to Redfin that allegedly limited competition in multifamily rental advertising. Attorney General William Tong argues the deal worsens unaffordable rents by giving Zillow an unfair market advantage. Is it any wonder New York led the charge? Manhattan’s median rent hit a new high of $4,700 in July 2025, marking the fifth record high in six months.

John Engel is a broker with the Engel Team at Douglas Elliman, and he is looking forward to his New Canaan High School Class of 1985 reunion this weekend — a chance to swap stories, reconnect, and confirm that the ’80s really were as good as he remembers: a time of mix tapes and convertible nights, handwritten notes passed in class, and a kind of connection that meant showing up, not logging on. New Canaan was and is a place where expectations were high and competition was and is brutal, that part hasn’t changed. So what’s it like forty years later, when some have far exceeded expectations while others have taken entirely different paths? Reunions are complicated that way, equal parts pride, nostalgia, and reckoning.

Check out John Engel’s Podcast, Boroughs & Burbs, the National Real Estate Conversation here.

Read this article on the New Canaan Sentinel website here.